Leaves & Life

Last week I was cooling down from my run, walking through my neighborhood admiring all the bright red and golden yellow leaves around me. This is hands down my favorite time of the year. I love the colors of autumn, the cool weather that calls for boots and scarves. I love everything pumpkin. I love crunchy leaves and the crisp smell in the air. It's just the best.

Then I shifted my focus and saw another tree. It was completely bare, stripped of all its leaves. Empty. It didn't fit in with its beautiful surroundings. I paused. Something about this tree resonated with my spirit. It called out to me yet with its voice brought a feeling of discomfort. I hesitated slightly when I thought I heard a silent whisper say, "Brittany, you are like this tree." Umm, excuse me? No - I want to be the pretty one over there with the multicolored adornment of leaves. But again, "Brittany, this tree represents you right now." Uggh, really, Lord?

I looked up at the tree again - I cringed at the thought of this portraying me and my life right now. It was so...so exposed. So vulnerable. I want to be stubborn, to disagree, to fight. What, tell the God of the universe He doesn't know what He's talking about? What can I say, I'm not always rational...

But it was too late - it had already hit me somewhere deep inside, somewhere I couldn't control. I knew He was right, I could feel it. To fight would be not only pointless, but detrimental to my spirit. I have been feeling as though things in my life are being stripped away. I have been feeling a little bare, a little vulnerable..exposed. It's new. It's scary. It's exciting.

The amazing thing is that trees lose their leaves to conserve energy and protect themselves from damage. The leaves would release too much moisture during the winter that the tree really needs to keep in order to survive. So the tree sheds its leaves to reserve its moisture and live. There must be a small sacrifice but the result is life.

There's so much beneath the surface - that is what is still alive and thriving. I'm not defined by my "leaves." To be able to concentrate on the roots - the source of life, one must shed whatever is holding it back. My Daddy is not taking things away from me to be mean or to discipline me. No, the complete opposite, He is freeing me from things that are taking away much needed energy. He is removing so that He keep me from harm and actually give me life.

"All this is for your benefit, so that the grace that is reaching more and more people may cause thanksgiving to overflow to the glory of God. Therefore we do not lose heart. Though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all." 

II Corinthians 4:15-17